The Top 15 Indications You're Having a Bad Hair Day

A horrified Don King offers you his comb.

Like magic, your ponytail stays in place with no rubber band.

Head lice have formed a tenant's union and are demanding renovations.

Sparrows divebomb your head territorially.

During lunch hour, your hair robs a nearby convenience store.

Your hair gets caught in the vacuum cleaner and the ceiling fan --
simultaneously.

Thumbs up from Dennis Rodman at last night's Bulls game.

You're selected as the next male cast member of "Friends."

Your date can't quite decide which one of the Little Rascals you resemble
the most.

Rod Stewart, Lyle Lovett and Michael Bolton over at the next table
pointing and laughing their asses off.

An hour before the square dance, and there's not an ounce of bacon fat to
be found!

Three cans of hairspray and you *still* look like the flying nun.

To get to your office from the parking lot, you have to tack into the wind
three times.

Someone mistakes your silhouette for Patti Labelle holding an umbrella.
and the Number 1 Indication You're Having a Bad Hair Day...

You spend the whole day fending off the advances of Ted Koppel's wife.